Twilight (2008)

I figured with Twilight season already upon us, I'd give the first movie a try. I hadn't seen it when it first came out, because even though it has vampires and is based on a best-selling series, teen romance isn't my thing.

As much as I tried to keep an open mind, I didn't like it.

Yes, the people are beautiful, and the acting wasn't atrocious as I heard, but I found it pointless.

The first 45 minutes involved our two leads being awkward towards each other, with the girl being annoyed with why the totally cute loner doesn't like her, and also her excruciatingly over-chatty new high school friends. We get it; the new girl is POPULAR AMONG THE LOCALS.

We find out that totally cute loner Edward doesn't like her because he's attracted to her bloodscent (and also 'cuz he can't read her mind, but that bit isn't expanded on), and after he saves her a few times, they get to know each other and start dating.

The next half hour's involved with our girl Bella meeting Edward's family, decent vampires who abstain from human blood and drink animals instead (they call themselves 'vegan', but as I see it, animal blood isn't synthetic blood, nor is it the opposite of plain ol' blood. Do correct me if I'm wrong), and playing baseball, the latter scene being the best part in the entire movie.

[I think that speaks volumes of my opinion towards this movie.]


Then we have some rogue vampires that do eat humans, and one of them, James, likes Bella's scent. So with some really lousy re-routing, we get to the showdown between Jim and Edward, which isn't too bad, but still can't beat the baseball scene.

Long story short: Bella gets bitten by James, Edward sucks the venom out after MUCH thought and deliberation, Bella is taken to the hospital, Edward says he wants to leave for fear of hurting her, Bella is adamant that Edward cannot leave her, Ed changes his mind, and then they go to the prom.

Some parts didn't make sense. James had stopped by Bella's father's place, that's how he knew they were on the run, and obviously he was at her mom's place as well to intercept the call (unless he had mad hackering skillz or something), so why didn't he kill them? We're not talking about 'feed' here, just normal killing. If James was supposed to be the ruthless and cruel type... I mean, he didn't even HURT her parents here.

Despite the irregularities, it was still okay for me, till I saw Bella's reaction towards Edward leaving. It was such a 180˚ for a character who through this entire time was rather nonchalant and 'whatev', so much so that she would get all clingy and borderline obsessive towards Edward when he said he wanted to leave. Yes, she loves him, and he did save her life quite a few times, but the overreaction was a bit unrealistic. I mean, he just 'said', he didn't actually do it.

I equate that scene to the butler telling Harry that his father died by his own hand in Spider-man 3. Though this one didn't make my jaw drop out of WTF-ness, still made the movie suck for me.


4/10. Watch it if you love Rob Pattinson, or if you love the book series. I've done neither (only crushing on R-Patz in Harry Potter 4), so I didn't really see anything special about it.

For some LULZ, do click here for Twilight: The Abridged Script.